I’ve talked a lot about surrender in this blog. I actually thought I was done with this first step of Sacred Success™ last April. But surrender unfolds at it’s own pace. It can’t be rushed. Though, Lord knows, I’ve tried.
Just this past week, waiting for my daughter to give birth, I’ve experienced a whole new level of–and whole new lesson in–surrender.
I flew to California just before her due date, July 8th, putting my life on hold to be present for the delivery. She’d be having her baby at home and I wasn’t about to miss it. Nor were her sisters who came from their respective towns, or her father who traveled from a foreign country.
The first few days were exciting…a family splintered by geography gathered to welcome a new member to the tribe. But after a week, the waiting began to wear thin as we dangled in a limbo of uncertainty. No one felt it more than the mother-to-be. She became a bundle of frayed nerves, seriously doubting if there’d ever really be a baby, sure she’d let everyone down by being late, feeling helpless and out of control.
The metaphor was inescapable. This is what I’d been feeling this past year. Which is precisely what the first step to Sacred Success™ is all about: waiting to give birth. Since last December, when I started my sabbatical, I’ve been dangling in a limbo of uncertainty, consciously relinquishing control, impatiently questioning if I’d ever be productive again, wondering what other people were thinking of me.
Fast forward to this July. At the very moment the uncertainty became almost unbearable, (as it always will) I got a message from the Universe…literally. I subscribe to a daily email called TUT… A Note from the Universe tut.com. Out of the blue, came these cosmic instructions for surviving and thriving during a period of surrender:
“So what if you don’t have it yet, barbara?
It’s coming. You’re gonna get it. You’re gonna love it. And then you’re gonna forget there was ever a time when you didn’t have it.
Learning to be happy while you wait, barbara, is worth learning. And to help learn this, just keep yourself busy.”
And now, days after the birth of my granddaughter, it’s hard to believe there was ever a time we didn’t have her. I wonder if I’ll feel the same about the next phase of my career, whatever it may be?? I’ll tell you one thing, I’m determined to enjoy the wait, keeping myself busy changing diapers!!!
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