The Absurdity of Arbitrary Deadlines

Written by Barbara Huson

“Want to make God laugh? Tell Her your plans”–anonymous

There are no accidents, right? Yesterday, I had the same conversation with 3 different people within 24 hours.

They all had a common theme: the absurdity of arbitrary deadlines.

The first was with a friend freaking out over a speech he had to write for Toastmasters. This happened every time he tried to write one. It was making his life miserable. But he refused to quit because, he declared, “I promised myself I’d stick it out for a full year.”

The second was with another friend also freaking out over a coaching program she was dying to do but couldn’t afford. She insisted she had to do it now. “If I don’t figure out this year what I’m really supposed to be doing,” she exclaimed, “I know I’ll never do it.” Did I mention she is 29 years old?

The third was with a first-time writer who’d given herself a year to complete a novel. The date was fast approaching but health problems kept interfering. Instead of cutting herself some slack, she sank into depression. “I feel like a failure,” she kept saying.

In their words, I saw the self inflicted craziness of my own making.

A while back, I gave myself a similar directive —finish my book proposal by the end of the year. Two years later, it’s nowhere close to completion. I’ve been beating myself up—unmercifully—ever since.

(Warning: Self flagellation does not further the creative process!)

Don’t get me wrong. Deadlines are a useful tool to keep us on track.

The trouble comes when we don’t meet them. Rather than rethinking the timing, we tenaciously cling to our commitment or brutally reproach ourselves for screwing up.

What if I started seeing things differently? Perhaps there’s a reason I’ve not finished my proposal. Perhaps the timing will turn out to be perfect. Only in hind sight can I possibly know what’s actually in my own best interest.

As today’s Abraham Hicks quote reminded me (no accident again!), “Life is supposed to be fun…If you are doing it for any other reason, then you are not connecting to your Source Energy.”

There and then, I made a decision.

From now on, if I’m feeling stuck, if doors stay closed, if nothing flows freely and it ceases to be fun, I’m viewing these as indicators that it’s time to surrender rather than doggedly pursuing a rigid decision.

It all boils down to this: Would I rather live with the tranquility of trusting a Higher Source or tolerate the stress of self-imposed pressure? Duh!!!

The Gift of Pneumonia

Written by Barbara Huson

Let me fill you in on what’s been happening since my last blog.

I’ve been practicing the principles of Sacred Success®. And let me tell you, it’s made a huge difference in my life.

Take for example, how my year began…with a nasty case of Pneumonia that wouldn’t respond to antibiotics.

I had just hired a highly skilled team. We set a series of deadlines….none of which I’d be able to meet.

BSS (Before Sacred Success®), I would’ve gone into a tizzy of ‘why me,’ bemoaning my bad luck, angry over the distractions, feeling like a looser

But instead of cursing the circumstances, I looked through the lens of Sacred Success®.

What I saw: it was time to Surrender. I knew Surrender was critical to Sacred Success®. But, hey, I already did it (see Sweet ? Surrender).

However, as I was learning, Surrender is not a one (or two) time event, but an ongoing occurrence.

Sacred Success® is an intricate dance of moving forward in Disciplined Action, then stepping back in Receptive Surrender. The signs indicating when to change steps are subtle at first. Clearly I wasn’t paying attention.

Pneumonia forced me to cancel everything. And, as Sacred Success® insists, I did so without judgment.

In Sacred Success®, nothing is ‘bad’ or ‘good’; ‘positive’ or ‘negative.’ Everything that happens is a source of information regarding our next step.

As I began mining the pneumonia for the message it had for me, I quickly stumbled on the Mother Lode.

“I’m actually enjoying doing what I never let myself do…stay in bed,” I wrote in my journal.

Here’s what was amazing. Even while bed ridden, I was still quite productive. I designed a new course, reworked copy on my website, had some fabulous conversations, attracted several amazing opportunities, took on new coaching clients. All in my pjs, punctuated with long periods of rest, happy as can be.

Then I realized what happened: As soon as I created my team, I slipped into busyness. It’s what I always do when I get focused.

Unconsciously, I’ve just assumed building a business meant crammed calendars, constant motion, lack of freedom, pressure to produce. No wonder, at some point, I always burned out…or lost interest.

But, I wondered, how do you play full out without going into over-drive?

My Pneumonia gave me another option and the permission to pursue it. The message: It’s ok to be still, to block out lots of unstructured time. It’s good for my creativity!

Guess what happened when I shared this finding with each member of my team, asking for their support in preserving my downtime? My health began to improve.

Believe me, it hasn’t been easy. Maintaining blank space goes against my very nature, like a shark whose internal sonar system won’t let it stop swimming.

But this time, I want to be productive from a state of rest and peace, not from intensity and frenzy.

I’ll keep you posted on how it’s working!

Yikes! I Can’t Possibly Take Time OFF!!!

Written by Barbara Huson

“There is no need to learn through pain” ~~A Course in Miracles

I wonder how many of you are craving some down time, a chance to step off the treadmill, but just can’t seem to swing it?

That’s where I was 2 years ago.

I remember saying to my guy, with a heavy sigh: “I wish I could take the next month off.”

“Why don’t you?” he responded.

I gasped! How could I possibly do that? I had all these “important” things to do!! Taking time off was unthinkable.

Then it hit me. I’d been interviewing women who made millions (my next goal) and saw something I never expected.

Right before these women soared, each one sank into a period of nothing happening, a time between, a void, often as a result of a crisis, like a devastating illness or painful loss.

These time-outs served an essential role in their eventual triumphs because they used them, as one woman put it, ‘to regroup and come back stronger.”

At that moment, I decided I wasn’t going to wait for a crisis. I could choose to step off the grid…by design, not default.

I invite you to do the same. Especially if you’ve had this nagging sense you need some down time.

I took 4 days off, going to a nearby hotel where I spent the entire time in self reflection. It was during this time I discovered Sacred Success®.

Believe me, I had no idea a whole new body of work was living inside me, waiting for me to slow down and tune in.

Maybe it’s time for you to slow down and tune in too. That’s why I created a Sacred Success® Retreat, as a way to give women a structured time out to go within.

If you can only take a day off, or even a few hours, that will work too. And you don’t need to go anywhere.

The whole idea is to eliminate distractions, do only what’s essential, connect with your inner wisdom and listen to what it has to say. (For more info, read my blog: The Beginner’s Guide to Surrender.)

You might be surprised with what you discover. If you’d like to share, I’m all ears!

The Flu, the Farm, and a Metafiscal Lesson

Written by Barbara Huson

“Wanna make God laugh? Tell Her your plans”–anonymous

I haven’t blogged for 2 weeks. Hell, I haven’t done anything for 2 weeks. Except see the doctor. Who told me I had the flu…and to stay in bed.

What?? Stay in bed??? I had important things to do!!! I had a teleclass coming up. A retreat to market. A speech to write. An interview scheduled. Clients to coach. I had no time for the damn flu!!!

Yet here I am, still in bed, bemoaning my fate, but too weak to do anything.

Then my mind traveled back to my last visit with my daughter, the farmer, just last month.

The week I was there, the seedlings that Anna and others had started were sprouting. It was time to plant them in the fields. The baby chicks were now mature hens. It was time to move them to bigger quarters.

But nature had other plans. It poured. And rain was forecast for the next few days.

You can’t plant when it rains, Anna explained, because the wet fields are too fragile. And the ground was too wet to drive the truck to the other henhouse.

Here they were, all geared up to do both. I watched in awe at what happened next. No one got uptight. No one cursed nature. No teeth were mashing or hands wringing.

Instead, the farm owner shrugged his shoulders, and said: “Enjoy the down time.” (What a concept!)

We found other things to do. (I say ‘we’ because, by then, I’d been recruited into the workforce.) We cleaned the eggs. We did outreach. One woman made a delicious apple crisp. Another couple worked on a brochure. We had a scrumptious stir-fry, loaded with freshly picked veggies.

What really struck me: everyone seemed grounded in a deep sense of faith–a respect for nature’s timing, a deference to forces out of their control, a trust in a higher order–that was so strong, they were able to dispense with their plans, embrace the delays, go with the flow and enjoy the whole process….with nary a complaint.

As I remembered this scene, I immediately saw the lesson.

Instead of fighting the current, why don’t I just kick back and relish the ride…even if it feels like I’m going nowhere?

I’ve written so much about surrender in this blog (Sweet Surrender) I guess I thought it was a onetime event. But I’m beginning to see…. the Universe has its own sense of timing. Instead of trying to out-control the cosmos, I’m going to lie back, let life unfold, delight in the downtime and do what comes next. In this case, I think I’ll write a blog!

Wanna Find True Power?

Written by Barbara Huson

I’ve been blogging about Sacred Success for almost a year. My purpose: to show you how to create Affluence—in a way that is meaningful to you and beneficial to others—by doing what you were put on this planet to do.

In review, Sacred Success unfolds in 4 Stages:

Stage #1: responding to the Call to Greatness
Stage #2: receiving consciously, surrendering to what is
Stage #3: pursuing your highest purpose by exercising discipline.

We’re now at the 4^th and final stage: leaving a legacy by modeling Greatness.

The truth is, we are always modeling something: either Greatness or Mediocrity (often disguised as Grandiosity).

Most people, as you can guess, are modeling Mediocrity. Why? Because it’s easy. All you have to do is stay in your comfort zone. But to model Greatness, you must recognize your value, live your Purpose , leap into the unknown, let your light shine, and leave your mark on the world.

This 4^th stage is where Real Power lies. I believe when enough Enlightened Women, (along with enlightened Men) come together to model Greatness, our collective legacies will change the world, heal this planet. It all starts with each one of us.

Have you thought about the legacy you wish to leave?

Need help? I’ll share some tips in my next blog.

Until then leave a comment below about which stage in Sacred Success you are navigating right now.

It’s Time to Get Tough!

Written by Barbara Huson

Listen up, ladies. We need to talk. We’re still on the ‘D’ word. But now we’re getting to the nitty gritty. This form of Discipline is what separates the women from the girls. This is where the rubber meets the road. This is, in short, the BIG SECRET to SACRED SUCCESS.

And I got it straight from the mouths of women who make millions. If you wanna play a bigger game, you gotta toughen up! That means disconnecting from your Inner Pleaser and growing thicker skin.

By nature, we women want everyone to be happy with us. Successful women are no different. Almost all I interviewed confessed to a “little girl inside me who wants to be liked.”

However, success requires us to make difficult, even painful, decisions that often have negative consequences for other people.

“You have to do the hard stuff,” said one mega high earner. That ‘hard stuff’ included firing employees, ending partnerships, holding tight during demanding negotiations, enforcing an unpopular policy, firing high paying clients, even enduring multiple rejections and disappointments.

In fact, virtually all the women I interviewed told me that their biggest regret was not making tough decisions sooner.

‘Toughening up’ didn’t mean these women had to harden their hearts, numb their senses, or go all macho. It did mean a dramatic shift in their mindset.

The shift sounds like this: ‘I’d rather be respected than liked.’

As one woman told me: “I tried to be nice rather than stand by my convictions. But I learned, you can’t always be liked, but you can definitely be respected.”

The recognition that earning respect is more important than gaining approval was what one woman described as a “watershed moment.” It definitely was life-changing for me…and liberating.

This one shift in thinking– ‘I’d rather be respected than liked’ –means developing a “rhinoceroses hide” while keeping an open heart. This is precisely how we’ll become strong, effective leaders without compromising our feminine nature. This is what will allow us to be powerful without being punitive, forthright without being unfeeling, responsible without being ruthless.

Where do you need to toughen up? If you’re like me, I bet it’s not just at work, but on the home front too. Leave a comment below about what “toughening up” looks like in your life.

Some Denial is Good For the Soul!

Written by Barbara Huson

“Forgetting what you are not enables you to remember what you are”

-A Course in Miracle

I sometimes wonder if we’re hardwired to hate discipline. I think exercising discipline is to adults what eating veggies are to kids… we do it because it’s good for us. But that doesn’t mean we have to like it!! And we’ll try anything to get out of it!

It wasn’t until my interviews with women who make millions that I had a stunning realization. The key to disciplined action is disciplined thinking.

When I shifted my focus from making myself do something to monitoring my thoughts, my behavior changed (almost) automatically.

I started using a technique I call Constructive Denial. That meant I began consciously and deliberately denying any limiting beliefs, irrational fears or feelings of inferiority about how small, inadequate or inconsequential I was. As a Course in Miracles explains: “Denial is as capable of being used positively as well as negatively.”

For instance, when that voice in my head says (as it often does) “you don’t have what it takes to do that!” instead of caving in, I come back with, “Thanks for sharing, but I absolutely DO have what it takes.” That one retort dramatically reduces my resistance to taking action.

That’s what these successful women told me they did. They carefully observed their conversations (internal and external), making sure they didn’t lapse into—or catching themselves when they did—automatic self depreciatory or negative patterns.

As a long time mega earner explained to me, “You have to remind yourself: I’m OK. I have strengths. It’s hard. But you have to!”

They made themselves focus on their strengths and successes, talk about their achievements, and reaffirm their value to themselves. They were constantly giving themselves pep talks, and repeating positive affirmations.

I found a terrific affirmation in a fabulous book called The Master Key System by Charles F. Haanel: “I am that which I will to be.” When I feel stuck, scared or small, I repeat that phrase, followed by “I have everything it takes to be a stellar success,” or “I am bursting with creative ideas for my next blog”. Then I act as if it’s true. It may seem contrived. But it actually works.

I suspect a lot of you do the same thing. Share your affirmations by adding a comment below.

A New(born) Lesson in Surrender

Written by Barbara Huson

I’ve talked a lot about surrender in this blog. I actually thought I was done with this first step of Sacred Success™ last April. But surrender unfolds at it’s own pace. It can’t be rushed. Though, Lord knows, I’ve tried.

Just this past week, waiting for my daughter to give birth, I’ve experienced a whole new level of–and whole new lesson in–surrender.

I flew to California just before her due date, July 8th, putting my life on hold to be present for the delivery. She’d be having her baby at home and I wasn’t about to miss it. Nor were her sisters who came from their respective towns, or her father who traveled from a foreign country.

The first few days were exciting…a family splintered by geography gathered to welcome a new member to the tribe. But after a week, the waiting began to wear thin as we dangled in a limbo of uncertainty. No one felt it more than the mother-to-be. She became a bundle of frayed nerves, seriously doubting if there’d ever really be a baby, sure she’d let everyone down by being late, feeling helpless and out of control.

The metaphor was inescapable. This is what I’d been feeling this past year. Which is precisely what the first step to Sacred Success™ is all about: waiting to give birth. Since last December, when I started my sabbatical, I’ve been dangling in a limbo of uncertainty, consciously relinquishing control, impatiently questioning if I’d ever be productive again, wondering what other people were thinking of me.

Fast forward to this July. At the very moment the uncertainty became almost unbearable, (as it always will) I got a message from the Universe…literally. I subscribe to a daily email called TUT… A Note from the Universe tut.com. Out of the blue, came these cosmic instructions for surviving and thriving during a period of surrender:

“So what if you don’t have it yet, barbara?

It’s coming. You’re gonna get it. You’re gonna love it. And then you’re gonna forget there was ever a time when you didn’t have it.

Learning to be happy while you wait, barbara, is worth learning. And to help learn this, just keep yourself busy.”

And now, days after the birth of my granddaughter, it’s hard to believe there was ever a time we didn’t have her. I wonder if I’ll feel the same about the next phase of my career, whatever it may be?? I’ll tell you one thing, I’m determined to enjoy the wait, keeping myself busy changing diapers!!!

4 Steps to Sacred Success

Written by Barbara Huson

I’m back to blogging about Sacred Success® . Though I never actually deviated from it. All my recent posts have directly stemmed from my new discoveries regarding this topic.

Now, however, I’m ready to dive right in and share with you specific steps for achieving Sacred Success.

First, a review for those who never read my post Let me introduce you to Sacred Success

Sacred Success is the next step after overcoming underearning.

Sacred Success is the game being played by women who are making millions (a very different game from the one most successful men are playing).

Sacred Success merges higher incomes with a higher calling.

Sacred Success means following your soul’s path, for your own bliss and the benefit of others, while being richly rewarded .

Sacred Success begins with a strong profit motive, and then requires that you give up profit as your primary goal.

The Primary Goal for Sacred Success is Achieving Greatness.

Sacred Success follows a 4- step process. I can only describe this process as a combination of getting your head clear and your hands dirty, or as an Irish saying puts it: “pray for potatoes with a hoe in your hand.” That pretty much describes the 4 step process, a process that is both sacred and mundane, that is divinely guided while grounded in action.

Here are the 4 steps:

Step 1. Receive consciously, surrendering to what is

Step 2. Pursue your highest purpose according to your deepest truths

Step 3. Exercise Mental Discipline

Step 4. Leave a legacy by modeling Greatness

Stay tuned. I’ll describe each of these steps in upcoming blogs. (I’ve actually discussed Step #1 at length in The Beginners Guide to Surrender-in 6 Simple Steps )

Bye, Bye Surrender; Hello, Sacred Success™

Written by Barbara Huson

I suspect my time spent in Surrender is drawing to a close. I’m walking away with a whole new appreciation for down time and empty space.

But just recently, I’ve been sensing a shift. My energy seems to be changing.

You know that light at the end of the tunnel I spoke about in Step # 6? I think I’m there…standing in the light, not looking at it from afar. The future is finally coming into focus.

I realize now, what I called Surrender was really Gestation. Despite feeling like ‘nothing’ was happening, I’ve actually been quite ‘busy’ birthing a new body of work…which eventually will grow into my next book.

I call this new work Sacred Success™…the next step after overcoming underearning. I stumbled upon Sacred Success™ while interviewing women who made millions. But I really didn’t put all the pieces together until I surrendered. Then, it was as if the pieces arranged themselves.

Just last week, like a proud mama, I took my new ‘baby’ out into the world.

I spoke at Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts (www.mamagenas.com)… my first speech in ages. I told them all about Sacred Success™. The 200 women in the audience were transfixed. It was like my soul was speaking directly to theirs. And they were hungry for what I was saying. Afterwards, I was deluged by those clamoring to hear more.

Now I’m chomping at the bit to share Sacred Success™ with even more women. I desire to do it right here on this blog. So invite your friends.

Discovering Sacred Success has changed my life. It really has. I believe it can change yours too. I’d love you to read my upcoming blogs and let me know what you think. I genuinely want your feedback.

Blog

The Absurdity of Arbitrary Deadlines

The Gift of Pneumonia

Yikes! I Can’t Possibly Take Time OFF!!!

The Flu, the Farm, and a Metafiscal Lesson

Wanna Find True Power?

It’s Time to Get Tough!

Some Denial is Good For the Soul!

A New(born) Lesson in Surrender

4 Steps to Sacred Success

Bye, Bye Surrender; Hello, Sacred Success™

Meet Barbara Huson

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